Weaning without trama

801logan

So our daughter is 19 months. She nurses A LOT!! Multiple times durning the night and tons durning the day. She doesn't have much of an appetite for other food either. We want to have another baby but we have to be completely done nursing before we can try. I would love to not have to stop but also we aren't getting any younger and we want our kids to not be too far apart.
I'm just worried I'm going to create some sort of trama by weaning her. She gets so upset when I say no. I don't want her to feel her needs aren't being met or that she isn't loved.
People have said to just cut out one feeding at a time but she pretty much will nurse multiple times an hour all day. I offer cows milk, chocolate milk, water, food and 99% of the time she refuses and just wants mommy milk.
Any suggestions??

2moms_somewhere

My son was just like this! We wanted to start trying for #2 after he turned 2, but he was nowhere near ready to stop weaning. Over the next 6 months I gradually cut out nursing sessions. By the time he was 2 1/2 he was only nursing once before bed (we co-sleep, so it was tough not nursing at night). I learned part of the reason he wanted to nurse so much was he craved touch. One thing he would do when nursing was rub my tummy. Instead of nursing him at night I cuddled him and had him rub my tummy. It was really hard for the first few days. He cried, I cried. I told him mommy had to start taking some medicine that would make him sick. Over the next 5 months we very slowly started cutting out that last nursing session. It was hard, but I am glad I didn't rush it. He completely weaned a month before he turned 3, and we had our final nursing session the day before I took my first dose of IVF medications. That cycle worked, and we are now dealing with him asking if he can nurse again once baby brother is born. Good luck!

K&H

Are you having legit nursing sessions? Or is she grazing a sip or two whenever she wants? If that's the case you could try making a bigger event out of it. "Oh, you want to nurse (or whatever you call it)? Ok, lets go to your room and we'll nurse!" Potentially if she has to leave what she's doing and go sit in a quiet room with nothing happening while she focuses on nursing she likely will ask less often because she'all be so busy doing other things.
You can positively and nonchalantly make nursing a more concrete event that she needs to stop doing other things in order to do.
This might just be enough to seriously slow her down. And then see how you all feel things are going with this change.

801logan

@2moms we co sleep also so at night it's a free for all. But she isn't a super cuddly girl. If I try to rub her back or legs while she nurses she will push my hand away. But she has to have her other hand on my other boob whole nursing. I don't want to cut her off cold turkey but even saying no once makes her so upset and me too.

@k&h what would you count as a nursing session? There are times she will nurse for 2 min and then other times for 20. When we are out and about she won't ask at all unless we have been out all day. It's mostly when we are home that she asks all the time.

starviewchick

Just out of curiosity - why do you think you need to wean her before ttc again? Some women nurse while pg and then do a tandem nursing. Just a thought:)

801logan

@starview I would love to tandum nurse but we see an RE and they say I have to be 100% done nursing before we can try. I have called twice asking and got the same answer both times.

2moms_somewhere

They all say you have to be done with nursing. Depending on what medications you are taking that isn't always the case. I actually did two medicated IUI cycles prior to starting our IVF cycle while nursing. I timed the nursing sessions to happen before taking any medications though. Do some research online if this is something you are interested in.

801logan

They said that some of the testing I would do prior wouldn't be accurate if I was still nursing. My cycle isn't very consistent either since having her.