update TTC and crazy questions

wasnervouswreck · February 2015

Well I am here to report that this was another cycle bust. It was very disappointing considering I went all out with the 100 mg clomid and 200 mg prometrium BID. Unfortunately my period was two days late as well so even though the test were blank I still had some lingering doubt until full flow started.

So now I am second guessing myself.....and perhaps overreacting?

Part of me wonders if IUI medicated or not is really a viable option at this point. I mean I have had several cycles , some with clomid and prometrium and some without with mixed results. with my KD I used 50 mg 3-7 with prometrium and got pg the first time on that protocol.

I have tried one clomid 3-7 and prometrium ( fresh) , two unmedicated cycles ( one fresh one frozen) and one cycle 100 mg clomid w prometrium (frozen) with BFN results since, so a total of 4 cycles with no success since I last got pregnant almost 4 years ago.

I am now 37 years old, normal 28 day cycles, prior unknown infertility diagnosis

Honestly am I throwing my money away ???

Should I move on to injectables

Should I go to IVF?

would I be better off trying to do a FET? and how hard is it to adopt them? can people just gift you a embryo or is that illegal? do you still have to do a home study if they are a gift ?

should I try to get a egg donor? Should she be a fresh donor or frozen eggs? is one better than the other?

has anyone ever shared an egg donor and sperm donor to reduce cost to have full siblings but raised them in different families?I am thinking ,what if I only want one or two kids and I have like 12 fertilized embryos, wouldn't it make sense to share them with someone who wants the balance or is that weird? Do people even do that ?

Should I just do three more cycles this year like I planned and if they are BFN move on ?

Am I overreacting ????

ashlettelopez27 · February 2015

I have no advice as far as how many cycles you should try since I got pregnant unmedicated with the second IUI. I can, however, give you some info about FET. Your answer is it depends. If it is important to you to know the donors of the embryo then you would need to go through and adopt. To adopt you'd have to do a home study and pay a ton of fees. If you want (or don't care) if the donors are anonymous than some fertility centers and programs have a donation program. The difference is in the wording. If it is adoption you go through all of the steps to adopt but if the word is donation you are given the embryos (after the donor signs off) and you only pay for the transfer. We just had friends do the donation. Good Luck!
This link has lots of info http://www.embryoadoption.org

Shanny · February 2015

Have you had any testing done?

MNmommas · February 2015

Hoo.. deep breaths.

First of all, I'm so sorry that this cycle was a bust.

BFNs are always a crushing disappointment. I was 30 when I conceived, and it took 6 cycles, back-to-back, before success. Each BFN was more crushing than the last. By the time I was in cycle #6, I felt pretty hopeless and was getting ready to sell the bulk of our vials & jump into IVF because I just wanted to be pregnant already. But #6 was the lucky cycle and I (thank goddess) did not sell my vials. DW conceived on her lucky #5, 6, or 7 (can't remember now) as well.

It sounds like you only had 4 unsuccessful cycles after your last pregnancy. But since you are considered "geriatric" in terms of age related to fertility (being over 35), time is of the essence if your preference is to get pregnant with your own eggs. Like Shanny asked, have you had any testing done? That could give you more direction in regards with how to proceed.

Above all, what do you want to do? What do you feel is the best choice for creating your family? Also, what are you comfortable with on the financial side? Do you want to be genetically connected? Is carrying the pregnancy/giving birth important to you? Is all of it completely irrelevant and your only concern at the end of the day is taking home a baby?

You said you had a plan and now you are wondering if you should scrap it. I think it depends. What was the reason for your plan in the first place? Is that reason no longer applicable and that is why you want to change things up? Do you think the freshness of your crushing BFN disappointment is causing you to second-guess yourself?

It never hurts to make a new plan, or several new plans, and then line them up and look at them all objectively. If you haven't visited an RE yet, it is something to consider. Best wishes! TTC can be a nightmare rollercoaster, eh?

wasnervouswreck · February 2015

To answer Shanny's question the only testing I had was during the last period of TTC . After more than a year of issues I was tested for literally everything under the sun . I had Thyroid, A1C FSH, estridol, etc. all test came back in the borderline normal range . The only thing that was high was my BMI.

At that point I had the HSG done where my tubes were blocked 50% and 75% ( probably from my IUD after my first child). That blockage was cleared by forcing the contrast through. I don't really count the previous fourteen cycles because the blockage my have contributed. After that I had three more cycles of clomid, unsuccessful and TTC last minute without clomid and got pregnant. My Dr believes egg quality/poor ovulation was a contributing factor, based on the fact that both my sister and mother went into early ovarian failure.

I had to go through eighteen cycles until I was successful.

I miscarried at 12 weeks and tried three more cycles with clomid/ and then finally clomid/prometrium and got pregnant with my rainbow baby.

I just don't know if I can do another eighteen cycles to go through another MC if the issue is egg quality/ lining issues.

I am not really worried about genetics or any child be born by my eggs , all I am looking for is another take home baby. I also like the idea of the genetic testing , if not on my eggs then on the donor eggs or donor embryos. And since there are known birth defects in my family testing would be a bonus. I am also okay with not carrying, so a surrogate later my be a requirement as well, and I am starting to realize that.
The money thing would be a workable issue. I would be comfortable paying about 15K for increasing my chances of having one or two more children. 25k + and I am having a harder time to justify spending that when my family could be completed with adoption.
My main concerns with IVF is the initial expense to get more expensive BFNs, OHSS and high risk multiple birth. And that's why I like the idea of the FET. The concerns I have with the FET are if the donor has bad eggs from age or they don't survive the thaw I am back at square one. How can I be assured that any of the embryos from any cycle the donor ever had actually resulted in live birth if the donor is anonymous?

As for my plan , I had the plan to try three more times this year medicated with clomid/ IUI and then next year move onto Dr assisted IUI maybe with injectables for a couple more cycles. The reasoning behind this plan was I want to get my BMI quite a bit lower and to allow my insurances to hopefully cover some of the labwork. It was also kind of to pacify my biological clock ( I am trying so there is a chance, and who knows maybe I might luck out and catch a decent egg)

I know this is rambling and thanks for reading, it is just a lot to think about , take in and weigh.

update TTC and crazy questions

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