I just need to vent

Goobie

*bang head against wall* I do not understand some people. I need to vent, so if you don't wanna hear about ignorant people, stop reading. This vent is about my stepdaughter, who is due to give birth at the end of the month. They were kicked out of where they were living and had to find a new place. They did, in a neighbouring town, about 20 minutes from where we all live now. I personally think this coud be a very good move, because it will force her and her boyfriend to think for themselves and be responsible adults if they are going to make it work. I really honestly, truly hope that they will NOT fall flat on their faces, lose his job, lose this place too because they are irresponsible teens. Oh, and for anyone who has not read my vents before, I have no issues with teen moms... I was one myself! I have an issue with anyone, any age, who gets pregnant then refuses to take care of themselves and the babe, because they are too busy acting loike a spoiled, selfish brat. OK, so on to the actual vent.

We got them a crib. Yes, it was free. Yes it is one of those Storkcraft with a drop down side. Yes, I got the retrofit package to bring it up to safety code. Yes, I managed to get 2 cribs in the same week. One needed just the drop down side fix kit, one needs the metal mattress holder braces changed too. No big deal, right? Yeah, I have not been abe to retrofit them YET, because all of my stepdaughters stuff was in our basement, and to know which needs which parts I have to set up BOTH cribs, then take them down again. I told her as soon as her couch/table/bed/etc was out of my basement, I would alter the cribs, and then send hers to her... Tim has to drive right past her new place to drop D off tonight. That was my "to-do" list today, the cribs. She took the crib yesterday, without taking the retrofit kit. Not only did she take the crob. then she proudly put as her FB status that she had assembled the crib "with nothing but a butter knife" and now "babys roon is done". EEEEEK! I will not even get into how a butterknife, though will do in a pinch is not a tool (and how I am obsessed with tools and have more then the average mechanic), and how without the retrofit kit the crib is ILLEGAL. I'll just let you tell me if I am over-reacting or if this is yet another bone-head move on their part. UGH, and the *best* news all week... she has to go for another ultrasound because they think the baby is too small, intra-uterine growth restriction, probably because she eats like crap, drinks no water and smokes 2 packs a day, but.... "at least it'll be little and easy to push out!!"

Goobie

Oops, I publicly posted it on Facebook that the crib was not safe because she didn't put the retrofit parts on, foreveryone to see what a dumbass she is. My bad. I'll put my crib together today to retrofit it, then take it back down till closer to Mortimers due date, and send all the other parts via Tim tonight. Then pray pray pray that she puts it together properlly... this is my grandbabys saftey you know!!

Goobie

LOL I would do that - BUT.... Tim has to drive past their new house, and as far as I know they have no reason to find a ride into our town before we leave for the wedding... and I think she will pop the day after we get home, so I woudl rather she did it now... I'm too freaking compasionate, thats all.

Praying.For.A.Miracle

H&B haha cracking up at your solution!

Goobs - seriously - that's just CRAZY!!! And no I hardly think that you're overreacting when she's clearly thinking of herself - not the baby.

Jais

Hey Goobie I just wanted to say that I understand. I hate seeing that kind of thing. Think of the baby not yourself. Seen that scenario too many times and it is annoying.

Also wanted to say that I found where you posted your +HPT's finally and I teared up. So very happy for you. I can't believe I missed that. Hang in there girl. Vent all you want.

Goobie

Aww thanks Jais! That was 6 days ago already that I started the day thinking I would never get my BFP, that they would run out!

I understand that she is excited about the baby and wants to get everything set up - but there is set up and set up RIGHT and when it comes to a babes safety, there should only be one choice.

Good news, I have MY crib converted already! And of the 2 carseats that I have, one expires a month after Mortimer is due, so I have to get rid of that one, but the other is good till 11/2012, and if this wee one follows the path of Boog and Moose it'll be out of the infant seat by May!

chandraandamanda

Word on the "I will not do more for you than you will do for yourself." That is pretty much ALWAYS the best way to go--though difficult. Sometimes you just have to step away and hope for the best. You're just frustrated because you care. Don't feel bad about that.
As for the growth restriction, I hope they're wrong about that and things turn out okay. Both of my friend's babies had a growth restriction and had to be delivered by a true emergency C-section 3-4 weeks early. It wasn't due to any fault of hers--she took very good care of herself throughout both pregnancies.

LovingMoms

Goobie - You are a very kind person and it definately shows; however for the fact that she knew that the crib had parts that needed to be fixed and didn't take them with her shows she is missing a few brain cells where she needs them.

I agree with Heather & Beni: "I will not do more for you than you will do for yourself."

So happy that you got your crib put together, if it was me, I would just keep it together and start getting everything ready, that way when your futher a long and don't have the energy it is already done:)

I didn't know that carseats have an expiration date??? Where would I find this expiration date as I have 2 in my van for our grandchildren.

*****Hugs*****

smartycat92

I don't think the crib thing is that bad... Maybe she just thought she was doing you a favor by getting the crib out of there and forgot about the fix it kit or didn't see it when she picked up the crib. And it just sounds like she was excited to get the crib up and get the baby's room done. Perhaps you can offer up Tim for a few hours one day to just go through and make sure everything is set up correctly / baby proofed... crib, crib bedding, car seat, any swings or gadgets they got for the shower. I know at that age as much as I thought I could do things myself, I secretly felt better if my dad made sure everything was A-OK

Goobie

smartycat - she KNEW about theretrofit kit, she just chose not to take it. And seeing as the crib was taken apart in our half empty storage room, I know thats not the case either... she's just excited, and I can't blame her that. Oh well, italked to her today, Tim will walk her through the upgrades, I thought it would be tonight, but looks like we don't have to go out there now. But at least she has agreed that even if babe is born before we get to fix the crib, she will not use it till it has been. That makes me breathe a little easier, since hers still has the plastic clips and the drop side... now the drop side could be wiggled with a brick under it so it can;t drop, of just LEFT dropped for a newborn, but the plastic matress holding clips frighten me, I have seen too many crack and then the babe is vulnerable to entrapment if the matress shifts.

LovingMoms - YES carseats expire! Infant seats are normally good for 6 years, convertables for 7, boosters 5. If you uninstall your carseats and look on that back side of them there should be the expiration date stamped right into the plastic that makes up the body of the seat, normally the back top, or back bottom (behind head or under bum area). If you can't find it, email me the makes and models and I will tell you where to look for them... and if you find the manufacture date then just count 6ish years from that. The reason behind that is the plastic breaks down, I have personally been allowed to snap an infant bucket seat (carrier) that sat in the original box for 5 years, and was shocked how easy it was.... scary!

LovingMoms

Goobie - thank you for the information. Luckily the car seats that we have for our granddaughters and the one for our grandson are new within the past year, but the next time I take them out I'm going to look for it!