My first time.....totally obsessing!!!!

em'smoms

Hi, I am pretty new to this forum and this is our first month trying ici at home for #2. I am totally obsessing about this so decided after reading some of the topics and posts here that this is a safe place to just vent!!

So here is my story- I just turned 36 and last spring we decided we better try for #2 before I got any older, I started using OPKs and for two months never detected a surge, then had a 40+ day cycle, went to our RE who got us pregnant IUI with number one and he said he did think I was ovulating every month because I was having periods but saw some cysts on ultrasound and gave me a tentative diagnosis of PCOS but blood tests showed good hormone levels. He told me to lose alittle weight and revisit the idea of pregnancy in 6 mos, he felt positive that I could get pregnant quickly again (it took on the second IUI attempt with DD). This fall I did the HCG diet and lost 15 pounds and after that started having short cycles of 19-26 days in length. In January we decided to start monitoring ovulation again so last cycle I did OPKs and started temping mid cycle. I did get what I thought was a positive OPK on CD9 but ended up with a 31 day cycle so ovulation was obviously delayed and I never got EWCM- just creamy and some watery in the week after the positive OPK.

Anyway so started taking Fertilaid about 2 weeks ago and Evening Primrose oil for EWCM help. I am now on CD11- second urine this morning (about 8am) had about a half dark line on OPK but another test at 10:30 was nothing. I have been trying to feel my cervix, still a beginner but I think it feels firm. Started mucinex on Sunday and CM is light and watery with a little white creaminess.

So here is why I am freaking out! Swimmers arrive TODAY! We leave for vacation Friday morning and return Sunday afternoon (flying so can not take the sperm with us!). Considering how inconsistent my cycles have been over the past 6 months I could ovulate anywhere between CD13-CD18 which means between Thursday and next Tuesday! My DP tells me I am just totally obsessing and she is no help what so ever since she is so "uninvolved" since she works long hours and it is my body and all! She is on board with our trying but has also been pretty ambivalent about if it takes, she is happy with our one beautiful daughter.

So not sure what anyone's advice would be besides to just CHILL OUT! I really wanted to inseminate before our vacation so I could just relax but now I am getting worried that we might get our insemination window on vacation and totally miss out on trying this cycle!!!! Oh and I am on spring break this week, my DD is at daycare yesterday and today so I have way too much time to obsess!

If anyone has any thoughts or advice on timing around vacation, I would love to hear it! I am so happy to have found this forum- reading all your posts has really made me feel better and not so alone on this rollercoaster! Plus it is nice to know there are other Type A obsessors out there!!!

KTZ

I dont think anyone on this forum has ever felt obsessive about timing.

JUST KIDDING!!:)

It sounds like you are doing everything you can to have the best possible chance at getting pregnant. I know they say to completely ignore the lh tests unless the test line is darker than the control line, but I definitely saw the test line get darker over the course of a day or so before I got a totally positive test. Your surge is probably coming. Since you saw the test line a half dark, I suggest testing as often as every 4 -6 hours, I got my positive at 12:30 am. You never know when its coming.

Hopefully you with get your +opk and inseminate accordingly.

I dont mean to sound woo-woo, but it has helped me to remember to breathe go for walks and get fresh air. Focus on turning the obsessive feeling into positive exited energy.

When in doubt, rent a movie and distract yourself.

Good luck. Welcome to the forum!

em'smoms

Thanks KTZ, I just took your advice and took the dogs for a walk! Will keep testing and "visualizing a big ripe follicle" LOL!

Looks like you have been on quite a journey TTC, have seen your posts around the forum. Best of luck to you gals!!! Hoping your BFP is near!!!!

kyhome123

I totally obsessed too! Your timing sounds good to me. Hopefully you will get your smiley before you leave. I know when I got mine I was jumping up and down... you'd have thought I got a BFP.

em'smoms

Crap is is now mid day Wednesday and still no surge....there have been faint lines since yesterday morning on OPK. Swimmers got here yesterday, we leave early Friday morning for our vacation.... I am flipping out that I am going to surge end of day Thurs or Friday and totally miss this ovulation!!!!! Please please please surge today!!!!!

palegreen

Even if you don't get your surge before you leave, you can always insem right before you leave Friday morning. There have been several women who have gotten BFP's from inseminating before they get their +OPK. Better to be too early than too late.

KTZ

Keep walking the dog. You are doing great. This is such a crazy process, but let your body do its thing.

Thank you for the good wishes. I haven't been on the TTC for very long, but it was a difficult first round because I had so many dramatic symptoms.

My fingers are crossed for you. Let us know!

em'smoms

OK so if I surge tomorrow and inseminate before we leave Friday morning do I just send the second vial back or do I take the risk and take it with me (out of the tank) to inseminate when we get to the hotel several hours later? I can't seem to find info anywhere as to how long the thawed sperm will live in their little vial. I could pack it in ice....

I worry we will be way to early to insem Thursday night and Friday morning if I don't surge tonight or first thing tomorrow morning.... aarrgghhh

em'smoms

Update- this morning OPK- 2nd urine (2 hours past first urine) and the test line is ALMOST as dark as the control...... I am going to hold my urine for the next 3-4hrs and test with a smiley next. Still worried that this is coming too late for a BFP since if my surge is starting this morning I might not ovulate until Saturday and we will have to insem tonight and then again at like 4am Friday morning which would be only 20hrs past first positive OPK.....I really wanted to wait until closer to 36 for our second vial......boo hoo but at least we are taking a family vacation- just need to relax!!!!

kyhome123

Are you using ICI or IUI vials? I would think that those two times would give you a chance. Crossing my fingers for you!

em'smoms

both vials are ici. I got pregnant with dd iui about 36 hrs past positive OPK..... but that was doctor assisted and I was 4 years younger LOL! Now am 36 and lots of cycle changes in past year.... thanks for the good wishes!!!

palegreen

You can send the second vial back if you want. I ordered two, only used one and sent the second one back. You have to pay a restocking fee, and one month's storage (unless you are already storing vials). You can keep the vial frozen in a small cooler with dry ice for two days I believe. I think Goobie has done this and might be able to give you more info.

ETA: you might want to call the airport to ask about bringing dry ice through airport security if it's something you're seriously thinking about doing...

Goobie

I was told 24 hours on dry ice, and did not try to push it too much past that. The dewar keeps them at about minus eight million degrees and the dry ice only about minus a hundred, so it is NOT as reliable, but do-able.

One thing I was thinking of, if your last BFP was 4 years ago, then remember that as you get older you O closer to +OPK, so if 4 years ago it was 36 hours, it might only be 28 now... do you temp to know when your rise is?

em'smoms

Hmmmm good thought about the dry ice- where do you buy it? Perhaps I can stuff a small cooler of it in my luggage????
I am temping but this is my first full cycle temping, last cycle I started late and due to my daughter and my being sick it was pretty wacky and I was unable to pin point ovulation (unless my luteal phase is 18+ days long I had to have o'd like several days after I thought I had a positive OPK but in retrospect am wondering if that test was really positive or I jumped the gun (lines test, now have smilies too) but did seem diphasic.

I took a smiley 1 hour past I took my second urine lined test that seemed almost positive but no smiley. Maybe it was too soon, i am going to hold for 3 hours now and try again. My cycle is so inconsistent it might be possible that I will surge on Saturday and we can insem when we get back but what if I surge tonight or tomorrow!!!!!!!!! Oh this is just so frustrating!!!!

Thank goodness I found this forum! I can't even tell my DP half of this cause she just glazes over, although she did have a good suggestion that if we totally miss it this time we could drop the vials off at our RE's office and just forget about trying from home and do IUIs with them instead next month. But I really wanted to try this month!!!!!! Waaa!

palegreen

you should be able to pack dry ice in your checked baggage without a problem. If you have a small soft-sided cooler, that would be pretty easy to do. They sell dry ice at the grocery stores here.

em'smoms

Ok so it is now 5pm and no smiley. We leave for the airport at 6am tomorrow morning so if we do dry ice we will have to buy it tonight and then maybe it would be ok until Friday evening. If I don't surge before we leave I don't know if we should even bring the vials at all. Maybe with all the anxiety and with traveling I won't surge until Saturday or Sunday and then we can insem when we get home Sunday. My CM is watery but scant, I have been unable to find my cervix- dang I have spent so much time with the mirror, flashlight and speculum and if it was at all possible I would swear that I just don't have one!! LOL!!!

It still is reachable and pretty firm, but I am new to the whole checking the cervix thing this cycle so I don't really know. I don't think I have ever had EWCM and got preseed cause I am actually concerned that maybe my CM is hostile?!? Doc assisted IUI got me pregnant quick but have not been "in contact" with sperm in many years!!! Figures my first month TTC would be uber stressful!!!

em'smoms

OK so crazy update, not sure anyone is reading but at least this is a place to "talk"! Got back from our vacation this evening- tested all weekend and STILL NO SURGE!!! Temps are still low as well, I am now on CD16. Tomorrow will be one week since the swimmers arrived so we are down to the wire here! Thinking if I don't catch a surge in the morning that we are going to call the RE's office and see if we can drop the vials off there and have them store and do IUIs with them not sure if that is "legal" will see what they say.....gotta ovulate some time!!!!!!!!!!!!!??????????????

kimNebby

Our first time was last month and my cycle went nutso. Instead of getting the smiley +OPK on CD 15, which was typical it was LATE, like CD 20 or so. It was so crazy, I don't remember. This cycle, we are more relaxed, no travel, and the smiley showed up on CD15, like clockwork!

KTZ

The sperm should be ok in the dewer longer than 7 days. From what I understand, NW is usually pretty good about letting you keep it an extra day or so. But storing it at the RE is probably a good back up plan.

Your cycle has been irregular, your surge may still come. If you tested twice a day or more while you were gone you probably would have caught it.

Good luck, I hope you get a +opk right away.

em'smoms

So still no smiley or double line this morning. I called my RE's office, we can't bring the vials there cause they only will accept directly from NW but I did schedule an ultrasound for tomorrow morning if I don't get a surge before then so at least I can see what is going on!!! I am feeling better about it now that there is a plan, if I don't surge tonight or in the am I will get some answers as to where the heck I am in this crazy cycle. CD17 today!!!! Temp still low and I think my cervix felt spongier today but I can still reach it easily so pretty sure that I have not missed my O.