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Guns & Boys

roses25roses25 Posts: 567
edited November -1 in Parenting and Life
Aiden's in another lovely 3 year phase of his. His new thing is guns, and I haven't a clue why it's so big all of the sudden. About a week ago, when Aiden got mad at me he told me I'm going to shoot you. I haven't heard him say that when he's mad again, but he plays pretend guns. He makes a stick into a gun and will say I'm shooting you. I heard him say that to his babysitter's husband today.

I asked the babysitter if they had any guns in the house and made sure if they did that they were locked up. So we should be good there. I don't know where he's picking it up from. He doesn't go to preschool. I don't watch Law and Order until after he goes to bed and that's the only show I watch with guns in it. When this first started I hadn't even been watching Law & Order as I shut off the netflix for the summer. The babysitter says he just watches mickey mouse there, but she doesn't think it has guns in it. Can anyone here confirm that Mickey Mouse doesn't have any guns in it? He watches Cauiou (spelling) and Barney here, but that's pretty much it. His TV is limited to PBS kids shows here at home.

Is the gun thing just something that 3 year old boys naturally pick up as part of their play? What would you say or do when your 3 year old pretends he's shooting someone? I've talked to him about the dangers of guns and how we never touch a gun since this has started.
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    KatydidKatydid Posts: 515 ✭✭
    edited September 2012
    I don't know where they pick it up either, but I have accepted the fact that they will do it. I also screened TV and made sure that they didn't have toy guns, but I realized that my efforts were wasted when my son chewed his toast into the shape of a gun and shot me. We now talk about gun safety, and they are allowed to play with nerf and water guns as long as they shoot at targets and not people. My six year old still doesn't undertand the finality of death, but the eight year old finally got it. They lose the toy if they aim at a person.
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    ZenZen Posts: 2,942
    edited November -1
    I don't know but I'm on the fence with pretend gun play. On the one hand, I have a problem with play killing or taking fun in harming another. But on the other ... well ... I don't see anything wrong with kids playing cops and robbers. In the olden days, kids understood "bang bang! you're dead!" Nowadays kids who find guns unsecured in parents' homes are shocked when their friends don't get up.
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    pbpb Posts: 83
    edited November -1
    I have never seen guns in any of those shows. I hate guns but Beckham is around them. Of course, unless Lauren is wearing her gun it is locked up- normally its never in the house. Beckham doesn't play guns but I know of tons of little boys that do!!!
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    michgirlmichgirl Posts: 406 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    My boys have have toy guns. We talk all the time about never pointing a gun at a person. If they do the gun goes away till the next day.
    And Mickey Mouse Club House does NOT have guns in it.
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    friendamyfriendamy Posts: 588
    edited November -1
    I definitely think its a "3 year old thing", and all I did was talk about how dangerous real guns are and how he's not to ever touch a gun (toy or not) at someone house without asking me or another adult. he's done well with leading me to a playroom and pointing to a play gun and asking if he could play.

    I read many write ups about gun play, and for me it came down to this: gun play is imaginative play. I won't stifle imaginative play :) I think it's good for him to create scenarios in his mind and act them out. at his age it's all about good guys and bad guys (the good guys always win! LOL). he also does sword play... and just like with guns, anything can become a sword (wrapping paper roll, Legos, a pretzel!)

    I don't like guns, and will never have one in my house. but I really don't have a problem with imaginative play involving one.

    here's a good link from PBS :)http://www.pbs.org/parents/raisingboys/aggression05.html
    Amy (39)
    DS (7) - d#470
    Boy, n.: a noise with dirt on it.

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    annerbonesannerbones Posts: 1,812
    edited November -1
    As a 3 year old teacher - it is normal, and while I had been taught for years "no gun play" the school I teach at now - a University lab school actually encourages it as safe play. There are rules but it is a good way for boys to use their imagination. I can get the name of the book with the research in it if you want.
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    Progesterone therapy and baby aspirin daily

    Two miscarriages in between (August 2012 - same donor as Maggie, and December 2014 with husband)
    Maggie
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    KariKari Posts: 1,765
    edited November -1
    I just have to quote an article I read years ago when I started teaching that said even if you deny kids toy guns, they will bite their grilled cheese sandwich into the shape of one and use it. So, yeah, it's kind of a boy thing. Justin's buddies at daycare taught him about guns, and while they're not supposed to pretend play with anything in the form of a gun, they do quietly where the teachers can't see them. I got Justin a laser with a trigger and that's as close to a pretend gun as he gets, but soon he'll be into water guns and nerf guns, so it's a losing battle. I say encourage safe play and set guidelines you're comfortable with, whether that's with or without guns.
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    EMG_RELEMG_REL Posts: 2,379
    edited November -1
    Oh, these are the kinds of things that I dread. Thank you, friendamy, for posting the PBS article. It gave me a lot to think about. There is a comment below the article that has me thinking, and, in fact, I've already worked it into a lesson for my middle schoolers: "Saying guns kill people is like saying pencils make spelling errors." I'm curious what my students will think about that. Anyway, I hope Aiden's phase is short!
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    lolabellolabel Posts: 99
    edited November -1
    No gun play in our house, not even water pistols. Zero. No making a finger into a gun shape and pointing it at people, zero. I was raised like that, too - and I have two brothers who also were never allowed to engage in it. We do, however, have plastic swords and shields, and chase each other around sword fighting - but there's a pretty clear distinction between that as play and violence in real life. I don't want my kid thinking for even a minute that there is anything cool, acceptable, or fun about guns - I want her to feel as repelled by them as I was raised to be.
    Mother to a 4 year old who has changed my whole world for the better!
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    friendamyfriendamy Posts: 588
    edited November -1
    see my take on it is if I ban them outright - completely - he'll be MORE curious, and more apt to try to sneak gun play in when I'm not around. I've never see a kid (or teen, or adult) more interested than when they are told they absolutely positively can't have ABC. :)

    clearly there are many different answers to this - the key is to find what works for your family and go with it :)
    Amy (39)
    DS (7) - d#470
    Boy, n.: a noise with dirt on it.

    age.png
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