Teasing Based on Size

roses25

Aiden told me tonight that this little girl tells him he's a baby on the bus because he's so small. He said he tells her that he's a big kid, but then she again says he's a baby. Does teasing really start at preschool age? or is it just that this kid really does thinks he's a baby because he's small. How would you suggest to your 3 year old to respond to another kid saying he's a baby? Unfortunately, this is going to be something that Aiden will probably face his whole childhood because he simply is very small (just 35 1/2 inches tall and almost 27 pounds at almost 3 1/2 years of age).

Zen

Teasing definitely starts now. I stop Shiloh in her tracks if she says unkind things about another child. It's not often but I want her to know that it's not acceptable. At some point I know that she'll be on the receiving end. I can only hope that her skin is thick enough by then that there's no impact!

Shanny

We have already dealt with this as well. Because Kate goes to Montessori where children are in classrooms of mutiple ages I was worried about this from the get go. As it turned out, her classroom was a new one last year so they started with only 3 year olds, who have now becone the 4 year olds and a new group of 3 year olds came in this year. My point is I thought we'd dodged a bullet for a couple of years, especially since her class was chalk full of petite girls AND boys (never been so happy about something so silly!). Anyway, she is still one of the youngest and smallest but not by any means to the degree she would be with a class of 3, 4 and 5 year olds. I was worried they would either say she was a "baby" (her baby fine hair doesn't help her cause either) and/or treat her like a baby - try to carry her, do things for her etc. So when she went to a 3 week session of summer camp this year it was a mixed ages group and became apparent right away this is what was happening. She didn't like going to camp and I couldn't figure out why. Then she told me that some of the girls kept talking about how "little" she is. I knew this wasn't meant in a bullying/teasing kind of way because I have heard Kate do it too. I'm bigger/taller/older than so and so. And the fact is she IS little so I wanted to give these girls the benfit of the doubt. Kate and I have since had hundreds of disscusions on dealing with this - tell the children that it hurts your feelings and if they continue walk away. If you cannot walk away or the still continue tell the teacher. We spoke to the school who in turn spoke to the older girls. They apologized and received a good lesson on how their words made someone else feel. I have explained over and over to Kate that certain people will always be bigger, smaller, short, older, younger etc etc and that it isn't a competition. People are born when they are born so they have no control over being younger and shouldn't be made to feel bad about it. And isn't it wonderful that we are all different? How bring if everyone was the same! When she recently saw a picture of me with about 8 friends at my 40th birthday she asked me why everyone was standing where they were in the picture. I explained that because everyone was different heights we could stand in a way that allowed us all to be in the photo together. I could see the wheels in her head turning. I haven't had to look hard for examples because they are really everywhere. I'd talk with the school for sure so that someone can address this with the other children and you can focus on Aiden and what this all means for him.

babymakes3

So far we are in second grade and no major problem. He is the second to the shortest of 110 kids. He knows he is short, he has seen the picks of me as a child being a head shorter than everyone else. Now we are all the same size. Poor kid. Do feel bad for him though. He wants to do all the athletics everyone else does but his body is,the size of a child a yr or 2 younger. Strong point is that he is one of the highest readers. So,he feels like he has something on them competitively. This came from him, not me

em'smoms

Emilee is petite as well and has also been called "a baby" many times at school. She is nearly 5 and only 37 inches and not even 35 lbs. Her best friends (twins) are VERY tall (father is 6'7") and they are always trying to pick her up and stuff. Emilee at first would get sad about it, but we talked a lot about how everyone is different, and that includes skin color, size around and size tall, etc. She also is a very strong willed type and tends to be a leader at school so I think it will all work out in the end. Now, since having the baby she says she likes being small b/c I can still pick her up and hold her (probably would be more jealous of the baby if I couldn't). Maybe Aiden will feel that way too!