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Adoption

Sunshine4BabySunshine4Baby Posts: 378 ✭✭
edited November -1 in Parenting and Life
Hi Everyone! I didn't know where else to ask but I remember quite a few of you have been presented with the option of adopting - I received a call from my cousin yesterday , she is approx 6 weeks pregnant and has asked me to adopt the baby. She is in Tennessee and I am in Illinois - has anyone had this situation before? Everything I am reading leads me To believe it is going to be extremely expensive :( I have 2 little boys from a donor and would love to add one more
Miracle to my family - but I have no way to come up with about $8000 in the next 8 months :(

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    K&HK&H Posts: 3,368 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    I would imagine lawyer fees would be the expensive part. You'll need advice from people in your state to be sure. Maybe a legal consultant at this time would be good.
    It may make sense for her to come to your state to deliver, or for you to go to hers. The different laws could matter. Also you'll need a home study I would imagine and that's pretty pricey.
    Is it possible that there's a different set of laws for kinship adoption?
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    ShannyShanny Posts: 2,456
    edited November -1
    This came up for me when I was ttc Kate. I didn't give too much thought to the financial aspect because my grandmother would have paid for everything. Is there anyone in your family that might be able to help? My grandmother was willing to because it was helping two of her grand children and she saw the positives of the situation for everyone.

    In the end my cousin ended up choosing to do an open adoption with a non family member. I conceived Kate so everything worked out for the best as far as I'm concerned. In retrospect I wonder if it wasn't her parents that were more interested in me adopting the baby than she was!

    Good luck.
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    babybabybabybaby Posts: 1,564
    edited November -1
    what a neat opportunity for your family. i have no advice on this, but i am excited for you. :)
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    Sunshine4BabySunshine4Baby Posts: 378 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Thanks BabyBaby - I think I have found a way to do everything! I can go down when she has the baby and she can sign over Guardianship to me at the local courthouse - once I have those documents I can bring the baby back and add him/her to my insurance - after 6 months I can start the adoption process here - this is just from me researching on the internet- going to call the courthouse there tomorrow morning ! Her first appointment isn't until July 9th so I'll have more idea of a due date then ;) thinking beginning of February !
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    scifimomscifimom Posts: 1,173
    edited November -1
    Wow that's awesome you found a way!!! I saw a sister sigh over guardianship to her sister and wife on an adoption show. They were able to take the baby home *from the hospital* and work on the adoption process. :)
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    ZenZen Posts: 2,942
    edited November -1
    I am so happy that you found a way to make this work!
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    old mamaold mama Posts: 4,682 ✭
    edited June 2014
    I agree about seeing if she would be willing to deliver in your state. It is more complicated between two states. You will need even for a private adoption an interstate adoption agreement if she delivers in a different state. You will need to find you an attorney even if you have to travel out of your city find one that knows about adoption. Contact an adoption agency and see if they will do your homestudy for you...you might ask if they will do the legal paperwork too...some will...Just explain the situation. Get started right away. I cam currently adopting a little girl. I am shocked by how much more you have to have done even since my last adoption 9 yrs. ago. The fingerprint backround check alone takes 6 weeks...not that you would have to have it done prior to delivery just to finalize an adoption. Does your cousin have insurance? If not, if she could come live with you and establish residency she could get on Medicaid. That would help. Good Luck. Sometimes these wonderful opportunities just fall into your lap.
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    Sunshine4BabySunshine4Baby Posts: 378 ✭✭
    edited November -1
    Thanks !! I'm not sure if she would be willing to come here since she has a 20 month old and she would loose her benefits for her if she does :( she is on Medicaid down there - unfortunately my mom is having 2nd thoughts about caring for another baby and she is the one who watches my kids while I work - I wouldn't be able to put the baby in daycare with my work schedule :( so for now (until she hopefully changes her mind) I have out everything in hold , praying that she has a change heart soon !
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    old mamaold mama Posts: 4,682 ✭
    edited November -1
    Don't give up until you have gotten all the facts in front of you and took a moment to brainstorm to see if there would be any other solutions. This would be a wonderful opportunity and one that you might regret a long time if you pass up. I wish you lots of luck as you decide what to do.
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