What would you do: daycare vs babysitter.

njmomma

My daughter is going to nursery school. She started in June and she really likes it. It took her only one week to adjust and she goes there with no problems. Prior to that she used to go to very small in-home daycare for about 9 months, and she could never fully adjust to it, she cried almost every day.
Anyway, fall is here and winter is coming and I assume there will be lots of germs / illnesses around especially in areas where there are lots of kids, right? My daughter just got over her strep throat that she got from her daycare and it seems like all the kids are running around there with runny noses and coughing. I am afraid that she will be getting sick there a lot during winter months.
I am thinking about bringing her to a new babysitter's house until spring just to avoid her getting sick a lot. The babysitter was recommended to me by a friend, and she is a sister-in-law of my former co-worker (so she is not a complete stranger). The only thing is that she only has 1 son there, who just turned 1 year old (she is a stay at home mom). I took my daughter to meet her and her baby, and my daughter was not a happy camper at all.
My main concern is that my daughter will be really bored there, since that boy is only 1 year old, and she is 2 and a half and there are no other kids. I am not sure how she will adjust too. But on the other hand, I am so scared of all the illnesses that I hear going around the daycare.
I need your opinions. I honestly don't know what to do. What would you do? If you have a child in a daycare, how often does she/ he get sick there? Are winter months much worse in regards to getting sick in daycare? Do you prefer a babysitter over a daycare or vice versa? Thanks.

K&H

If she's happy where she is I would NOT pull her out just for a short time. Illnesses come and go, either you get them or you don't. Can't really live your life around the fear of them, you know?
Does she take Vit C everyday? Sleep with the window open? These help, in my opinion

mel

I agree. Yes, she might get sick if she's in daycare. She also might get sick if you ever take her to the store, or if you get an illness and pass it to her before you know you even have it. I think routine and consistency is far more important to a child that age than avoiding the possibility of illness. My kids started in a center in winter at 2.5 years old and I know they were sick off and on, but they loved their school and I trusted their care providers. That is worth so much.

MNmommas

The only reason I'd switch is if it is a hardship to you when she gets sick - ie if you have to miss work and it affects your income beyond your budget or decreases your job security.

Shanny

I agree. That much change is not good for kids. Practice good hand washing for both of you and look into immune boosting supplements. Ya know what really strengthens the immune system? Being exposed to illnesses. You can either play the game now or in kindergarten but the exposure will happen either way.

Be grateful you found a place she is happy - there is a lot to be said for that

babybaby

i think that at her age the socialization aspect of daycare isn't really that much of a plus. she has a year or two to really need that, IMO. and i would personally prefer a highly-recommended and trusted home sitter with one other kid to a daycare center environment at her age. but if you intend to put her right back in next spring because of illness only, i would probably just bite the bullet and keep her in daycare. stability and routine is a big thing to me, and i would hate to jerk a kid in and out of that. the adjustment period aspect of it alone would be reason enough for me to not do it.

TheOtherLovingMoms

If she's happy where she is then I would keep her there. Why change her routine for just a few months especially if as you said she wasn't a happy camper when you took her to meet the babysitter. As Shanny said being exposed to illnesses is going to help strengthen her immune system. Washing hands often will help along with the immune boosting supplements. The more she's exposed to now the stronger her immune system will be once she starts school and everything you can think of is being passed around.

Zen

Another vote for daycare. It offers stability and routine and supervision. Exposure to more kids and more germs may mean more colds. But ... in the long run her immune system will be stronger for it. Studies have shown that kids who attended daycare missed less days of school (kindergarten-1st grade) than those who were in group settings for the first time starting elementary school. Your daughter is already there and she's happy. Stay put!

insearchofadonor

I too would keep her at the current place, because like it or not she is going to get sick wherever she is. I too was soooo worried about all the illness at my son's daycare when he started there 18 months ago, and yes the first winter he went through there he did get about 5 colds, lol, but this winter (I'm in NZ so our seasons are opposite so we're just coming into spring now) his immune system has been so incredibly strong that he has only had ONE cold all winter (and there have been kids with runny noses, coughing and sneezing every time I've dropped him off there ugh!) and the reality is, he would have got one cold this winter, I am sure, if he had NOT been there too.

I was always really fearful too about the mass of germs at daycare, but as others have said too you can't live your life in germ avoidance mode because a simple trip to the supermarket could infect you all with something awful too. :-P

Yes, her first winter might be a bit rough, and while that is not a very comforting thought right now, her immune system will be infinitely more strong for it by next year! Someone recently said to me that they either have to build up their immunity (through this kind of exposure) at daycare or at school, and personally I would much rather it was before my kids hit school age because then it is their day-to-day education being effected by lots of time off school through the winter months.

And yes, if your daughter is happy at her current place, that TOTALLY trumps the illness issue in my mind, because I could not handle it if I knew my son (and my daughter, who has just started at my son's daycare last week) were unhappy on a daily basis at the babysitters, versus being happy at the daycare - albeit getting sick a few times through winter.

Good luck with your decision though! I know it is really tough, because I hated the illness aspect last year too. But it WILL improve as she gets more and more exposure, I promise. :-)

njmomma

I can deal with 5 colds in first winter, but my daughter gets sick just about every single week. I honestly don't remember a single week, where she was completely healthy for 7 days straight. And she wasn't like this before she started this big daycare.
MNmommas, you are right, my job is in jeopardy. I call out every single week, miss about half of my time that I am supposed to be there. I don't get sick days, so if I am out, I don't get payed and we are losing money. And now I am really scared to lose my job.
As SMBC and having only one income, how did you survive when there is nobody except for you to take care of the child when she is sick and you have to miss work a lot? Am I the only one with a little child that gets sick soooooo often? And it all started when she started the daycare.

K&H

Can you hire a nanny?

Shanny

Kate was sick ALL the time. For YEARS. I was so lucky to be able to bring her to work with me except when it was at its worst - usually stomach bugs was the only thing I would actually take off for. I can take her to the doctor any time during my work day too so that was never a big issue. I say that now, but I know at the time it was not as easy peasy as I am making sound or THAT stress free - for me or my employer. But we were darn lucky regardless.

Now that you explained a little more about your situation I might feel differently about moving her. If she is happy there come spring would leaving her there be an option? I just hate to see her going back and forth for this reason.

Do you do things to help build her immune system?

njmomma

K&H, I had a babysitter in mind (my original post), but my daughter would not go near her. And I already told that babysitter 2 days ago, that I will keep her in a daycare. But today my daughter is sick again with a fever,
Shanny, what do you recommend for building her immune system? I bought children's multivitamins, but she refuses to take them, I even bought different brand and thought she might prefer something else, but still no luck, she refuses to take her multivitamins.
I was also thinking about fish oil since it has lots of vitamin D, but she would not take it either.
I have a humidifier in our bedroom every night. I honestly don't know what else I can do.
Any suggestions ladies? Thanks.
Edited to add: Also we wash our hands ALL the time. I even called the daycare director today and asked her about handwashing policy at the daycare. She said that they wash their hands every time before they eat and after they come back from the playground.

Shanny

In addition to seeing a chiropractor Kate was on all kinds of supplements. Some she still takes but most she doesn't anymore. It has been a while, let me see what I can remember and I will probably butcher the names

Silver colloidal - hide it in smoothies etc
vitamin D - chewable berry flavor
probiotic - chewable berry flavor
fish oil - though she has recently stopped taking this because she cannot tolerate cod
elderberry syrup

I know there was one or two more at the height of it. I honestly have no idea if it helped or not. I feel like the elderberry syrup does make a difference if you take it in the winter. I actually took it this morning because I woke up with a sore throat. If you have a good health food store you could ask them for suggestions as well.

Zen

Missing work for illenss could be a game changer. The nicest part of Shiloh going to a small home daycare (usually just 3 kids) was that I did not miss work for colds and minor illnesses. At preschool, kids who ran a fever or threw up were sent home and had to stay out the next day too. Shiloh was not sickly but if she ran a low-grade temp with a cold or ear infection ... I did end up working from home the next day.

With 3 kids now, appointments for dentists and doctors are killing me. I was wondering what other singles do -- or couples if both work full time!