Hey Shanny...

michelle.malott

I'm going to start my daughter in the toddler room at a montessori school in the fall, and was wondering if you could tell me a little about your experience with montessori. I don't know anyone who has had their kids in a true montessori environment like we are looking at, just montessori based. I love the place (there are chickens, how could you not love it!?), but I am a little concerned about the lack of structure. Or is there a structure that's not visible to a casual observer? I'm super hard core about our daily schedule so I worry Ali wouldn't do well. And I keep going back to that darn bowl of graham crackers out for kids to snack on whenever they want, eating at specific times is one of those things I'm hard core about...

babybaby

oh, wow. i didn't know that about montessori. i went to a preschool that was similar to that myself, and it was supposed to be a pretty great one: pet horse named snowball, easels open all day, kids running around barefoot like little hippies. . . i apparently thrived. but now? i am a nut about structure. i think that would drive me bonkers.

michelle.malott

Ha! Yeah, sounds a lot like this school. They take care of chickens and ducks, and wear slippers they bring in. I really like that they push independence and self motivation, it's so different to what I'm used to that it makes me nervous. I've noticed on these boards that Shanny is a big advocate for montessori, so I thought she could make me feel better about all this

Shanny

Hmm, maybe you can tell me a little bit more about your child (age, personality), why you chose Montessori over traditional schooling, what you are hoping to get out of it, what your concerns are etc? Particularly the concerns - I am having a hard time getting that from your message

I am so submerged in it now, and have been for the last few years that it is really hard for me to remember what my reservations were in the beginning (yes I had them once upon a time as well).

As far as structure, that's kind of hard to answer, depends a lot on the school, teacher and classroom (ages of the children). But, no for the most part you won't find what we all think of as a structured school environment. the children are free to choose their own work at their own pace. They are given lessons by the guide and observed to know when they are ready for the next lesson. Snacks are usually self serve but that doesn't mean a guide will not redirect a child before they eat an entire bowl of crackers. They usually have snack in groups of 2 and are given a lesson appropriate to the food initially (spreading cream cheese on a bagel for instance) as well as what a serving looks like. At times, they serve others snack as well. Same guidelines pertain to work and lessons, they aren't allowed to choose work that they have not had a lesson on or that is not developmentally appropriate, they are not allowed to wander around a classroom disrupting other children. They will be redirected by the guide or assistant to chose work. If they need help from the guide or assistant and they are unavailable there is usually a spot to wait until they are available. They may or may not have free access to their garden/courtyard/outdoor space.

I could go on and on about how wonderful it is, but I will hold off so that I can address your specific questions and concerns.

michelle.malott

Ali will be about a month or so shy of 2 when she starts, and will be going into the toddler room. We live in an awesome school district, so at this point the long term goal is to keep her in the montessori school thru the primary level. She is still little so it's hard to tell, but so far her personality is really social and outgoing. She's generally cheerful, and will follow directions pretty well, as much as any 15 month old will anyway. We mostly chose this place because they will take her so young, and they are on the way to my wife's work. I think what really sealed the deal for my wife is those chickens
I think my main worry is the lack of structure, and how that will impact her now since I keep a very structured day, as well as in the future when she starts public school since the public school model doesn't allow for much freedom.
(As an aside, I taught 5th grade in a public school before deciding to stay home with Ali, so maybe most of my concern is just how different this all is to how I taught?)

Shanny

Many children transition into 1st grade very well after primary. The biggest "problems" I could see would usually have to do with just going from a small "pre school" to a larger elementary. But that would happen for most kids anyway just at the kinder level. Most kids who go to traditional school from primary that I have seen are usually well ahead of their new classmates, they've been reading since an earlier age, already write cursive etc. But they have an adjustment to make in the new setting so I think it pretty much works itself out. Several parents I know put their kids into public kindergarten after completing the whole primary cycle (3-6) and I can't imagine doing that because as I said they are usually academically pretty advanced and I would be very worried about boredom.

As far as the structure, I think that her days will still have quite a bit of structure, some imposed by you, some by the school and some on her own. She will wake at the same time and go through your morning routine with you and your wife and then be brought to school. She will shake hands and say hello to her guide and probably wash her hands. There may be some kind of rug time where they sing songs and talk about thing or are read to. She will have a 3 hour work cycle in the mornings (generally somewhere around 8-11), they will go out to the play ground, have lunch and take a nap (assuming she is staying a full day). The 3 hour work cycle will include getting lessons, choosing work and observing other children do the work they have chosen. She will be taken to the toilet whenever she expresses a need and at set intervals by the assistant guide. Toddlers are generally pretty methodical and crave order so she will probably have her "go to" work that she does as soon as she is able to choose her first work. This is the child's favorite thing and what helps them to relax and get comfortable in their environment. Some of the most common at that age are painting, sweeping, hand washing and pouring work.

Are you able to observe her classroom through a one way mirror?

Are there any other specific question you have?

Giving her more independence and responsibility between now and when she starts will go a long way to making her transition easier. I'm not saying you have to Montessori your whole house and life but if you'd like some basic tips, I'd be happy to give some ideas.

coryandamanda

It's funny because I was looking into Montessori for M as an option to start him in PreK,K and 1st a year earlier and then transition him to public. But all the preschool and elementary teachers I got input from said that in their experience over the years almost all the kids that come from Montessori are behind when they transition to public. There are 3 Montessori schools in the immediate area so it isn't like they all come from the same place. Interesting.

K&H

Not to thread jack, but CandA, why would you want him to start earlier?

Shanny

Montessori is so widely misunderstood that I really wouldn't be surprised if those teachers were just regurgitating something they heard somewhere or some assumption they made. A preschool teacher would have no basis for that observation anyway. Sorry, just obviously a hot button issue for me that traditional educators take every opportunity to "warn" parents away from Montessori.

coryandamanda

K&H- he only misses the cutoff by 4 days and he is extremely advanced. It depends on where he is socially and emotionally, etc when the time comes of course but we are just finding out our options.

Shanny- I only spoke to their particular preschool director. The rest were all the kindergarten and first grade staff at the girls' school and a couple other elementary teachers I know personally. They basically all had the same thing to say as a general rule but of course there are always exceptions with self motivated kids and very involved parents and just naturally bright kids. Maybe the Montessori schools in our area just suck....didn't mean to diss on it at all. Just sharing my small experience thus far

merilung

Shanny wrote:

Montessori is so widely misunderstood that I really wouldn't be surprised if those teachers were just regurgitating something they heard somewhere or some assumption they made. A preschool teacher would have no basis for that observation anyway. Sorry, just obviously a hot button issue for me that traditional educators take every opportunity to "warn" parents away from Montessori.

I agree with this. I was skipped ahead a grade after I transitioned from Montessori to public school because I was so incredibly bored, and I know several other grown Montessori kids who had similar experiences. The kiddos I nanny for now attend Montessori school now and also seem to be quite a bit ahead of their same age peers who attend public school - or other private schools, for that matter.

Shanny - not to derail michelle.malott's post, but if you happen to have any good links/resources on Montessori home parenting for very young children I'd love to see them!

Zen

My knowledge of Montessori schools and schedules is limited but I LOVE the idea of unstructured meals and open snacks. Babies start off crying/communicating when hungry, eating their fill, and then stopping. In our country of rampant obesity, we go from breast and formula feeding to actually teaching kids to eat and crave all manner of junk food. It's used as both reward and punishment and then we wonder why we have miserable teens and adults struggling with self image and obesity. If Montessori schools have even the vaguest clue about letting children choose when to respond to hunger, I'm 100% in favor!

This is one of those things that I aim for but don't always manage to practice what I preach. But I do try!

Off topic - S missed the kindergarten cut-off by 3 weeks and I agonized over starting her earlier privately. Ended up going with the set norm and am happy I did so. Shiloh is leagues ahead of her fellow kindergarteners is all things scholastic. BUT she is at level on the physical and occupational (dexterity) side. When she soars ahead she can occupy herself [somehow] so she's not bored. And in things like sports or other play, she can keep up too. I put her in ballet last year without regard to kindergarten cutoff and she was miserable. Loved the music and dance. Adored her teacher. But when other kids learned steps faster, Shiloh froze, cried, and ultimately refused to engage. This is just her personality but given this factor, I am very happy to have her the oldest in her kindergarten class. It's also why even though she's tested as gifted, I'm waiting until the 2nd grade to see if she can thrive here or if I should transition her to the school with gifted program a few miles away. Sorry for the thread-jack!

michelle.malott

Thanks Shanny, that's helpful
On one hand I can see how a child can be behind when transitioning to a public school since the public schools generally build on topics taught the previous year. Although you would probably have the same problem moving from one school or school district to another though since the curriculum doesn't match up very well most of the time. On the other hand I would bet anything that the typical montessori student has a much better grasp of the foundational ideas, just based on the manipulatives I saw in the class rooms. I hope Ali is one of those smart, self motivated kids that does well wherever she goes. Right now she mostly just runs around getting into everything and saying 'uh oh...'
Anyway, I would love some tips/resources Shanny!