not sure how to feel

F2M n Spouse

We've tried numerous times, spending thousands of dollars/draining our bank account to try for a baby and still nothing. Sometimes I avoid social media because of all the people who are pregnant or announcing pregnancy. I just sit and think why me?

The last week or so I've been feeling really down. Just found out Heaths brother and his girlfriend are expecting and my heart is breaking for that baby. They both smoke pot and drink regularly, he can't keep a job longer than a month and she works part time at minimum wage, both high school drop outs, she was fired from my work for sleeping with other employees while on the job, they break up every other day..the list could go on.

I dont get how they think they will afford a baby but yet people like Heath and I who are more than deserving/willing/wanting to start a family of our own are struggling. I know it will make us more appreciative of the gift of life but I don't understand how some people get blessed with children?!? It seriously baffles me.

We both just feel so defeated. I don't lIke to talk about it because instantly the alligator tears start but I feel like it's a slap in our face. And it just plain erks me to the depth of my soul. They have NO financial means of taking care of this baby so another baby that our hard earned tax dollars are going to be spent on for who knows how long. How can people be so irresponsible? And shoot the kid probably isn't even his brothers considering just 2 months ago I caught her at my work leaving with a guy but yet his brother just thinks I'm blowing smoke or something.....just feeling so hurt and let down.

OkayBaby

I know EXACTLY how this feels. And started a good long thread about it e other day. Many women ttc go through those feelings, so at least know you're not alone. And it's definitely not fair. Hang in there, I hope your BFP is sooner than later.

tinydancer

yup I know that feeling too. I say take a journal and write or get away for a bit.
many people will tell me to just let it happen but hello, you cannot let it happen when you use a donor. its not possible. its not like natural sex and I find that frustrating and maddening to hear it when they dont know.

I have other children and got pregnant easily. so my issue is my body not working now and thats a failure in some ways

F2M n Spouse

Yea I here that ALL the time!!! Dont stress, it will happen. Yea like my boyfriend is lacking the main structure needed in all of this lol...so please tell me again how to not stress and how it will happen? Jump the border they say....lol. Some people dont understand and probably never will since they don't have to go through all the measures we do. I seriously would NEVER in my wildest dreams ever want someone to have to go through this whole process. It can really break a person down.

old mama

I don't understand how things work either. Social media filled with women killing or abandoning their babies. I see lots of the same thing you see with your family too. It's not fair. All I can do is hope for you.

b&kmakebabies

I totally get it. I also avoid Facebook because I'm sick of seeing the pregnancy announcements. Which makes me feel bad because I hate that it affects me so much...and very few people actually "get it." So frustrating...